Yes. It hurts.

But whenever it does, it reminds me where i am and why am I here.

I never did take anything seriously especially my feelings. Because certainly, if my feelings tell me what I should or should not do, I wouldn't be here.  I would be somewhere there isn't possibly an exit or escape. Therefore, people, I would like to tell you why I keep my face harden, and especially try not to let my feelings shown.  Not just me out there, I'm sure of it, that is the only who's doing this.  We're not being strong.  It's why we are weak, that we cannot show our weaknesses to others.  It makes us look weak.

You see, I am easily terrified and can easily shed a tear as anybody would.
I just hold it back as easily as it comes.

I am quite sensitive. Honestly, I anger myself too much I surprised myself at times. And I am really shocked to see a tear blowing up whenever something sad happens. And I cannot ever let these kinds of feelings outside.
It happened too many times, and I have lost precious things that I know I cannot lose, most of the time I am not even aware of it.

It's like a balloon. You know, you fill up a balloon with air. But what if something sharp poked it and BOOM it goes, it just disappear.
It doesn't make sense but try to compare it with a man holding back his tears. Now imagine if he is poked by a "needle." It would be a disaster.

I'm not that good in expressing my feelings toward something or someone but when it comes to holding it back or being patience enough, I am up to it. I have been pushed around and jerked here and there long enough that I know that I can hold my emotions in place. I know what will happen if I just let it out.

So you see, even if someone reads this or not, I don't even care anymore. I just want to let someone know that I am not as strong or calm or patience as I look.  My face is hard at times but you do not need to see through someone to know his real emotions. You just have to look as clearly as possible. You do not see through a diamond but you can see it's brilliance just by looking at it.

Here I say it clearly and I say it now,
I am but a person, a person with feelings and emotions, just like anybody else. And like anybody else, I can have something that differentiate me from the others.

I am but a human being, capable of loving, hating, and caring for others.

I am but a creature with a sophisticated brain and a gift to think.

I just learn a lot from experiences.

-L.E.G. the Infinity plus One.